I used to pray for God to age me quickly.
I’d pray for Him to go ahead and gray me out, to maybe make me a little taller. I’d try to dress ‘like a mom’ mostly because I do like cardigans, but also so maybe people would think I look older than a high-school kid. That maybe, just maybe, I’d be taken seriously. That people wouldn’t squint and say “you don’t look old enough to (whatever).“
And y’all are right. I don’t look old enough. I think that was intentional on God’s part.
God fashioned me as a curvy, short, muscular little human. I was born and raised in Brazil, and even with my light-colored skin and dirty blonde hair and blue eyes. I have European roots but I’m 100% Latina. I don’t match my mom’s brown hair, but that’s okay.
I’m 5′ and not even a whole inch more. I am strong and able, with tiny hands and a big heart. I can’t reach the top shelf, but I’ve run marathons. Yes, I was married for 2 years, and I’m divorced, and I started a ministry for women. I have a degree, and yes, it’s a 4-year one. I already finished high school haha, and my 10-year reunion is next year. I love Jesus a whole whole lot, and I give him 100% glory for carrying me through all my years, through which He’s never left my side, never let go of my hand. Because He was holding me is why I walked through some really cool stuff. He pulled me along where He was going.
And I don’t look old enough, or strong enough, or tall enough, or smart enough, but the great I AM who dwells in me… He is enough.
I am answering a BIG calling, obeying BIG time, and I’m stepping in to lead people who are much older than me. It’s the scariest thing I’ve ever done, because I am way out of my league. It’s my little neck I’m sticking out, and trusting that Jesus is MIGHTY enough to pull through for me. He always has, and I know He will.
While I’ve come to expect the comments…
“I’m sorry, how old are you?”
“Oh I thought you were in high school.”
“Wow, you don’t look old enough to have been through that.”
“Really? You don’t look Brazilian.”
And my personal favorite “Who’s that kid?”
(here’s me, sitting on a box turtle… ha)
… I know that someday my looks will catch up to my age. Someday it might be easier to get up to speak to women and not be questioned about which high school I attend. All I know is that this is a funny lesson about being enough: it’s always something, isn’t it?
People will find SOMETHING to question you about, to invalidate you, and to tell you that you’re not enough. Sometimes they don’t even mean to hurt you, since they don’t know how many times you’ve been told that one thing.
My question for you is: will you let those words keep you from doing the incredible things God is asking of you?
Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity.” -1 Timothy 4:12
He has made us competent as ministers of a new covenant—not of the letter but of the Spirit; for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life. -2 Corinthians 3:6
But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. -1 Corinthians 1:27
