I couldn't believe my eyes. I couldn't believe my ears.

I was so stunned that I didn't react right away.

I am fully funded.

I AM FULLY FUNDED!!!!!!!!!!!

screaming/thrashing/punching satan in the face/newfound karate moves/spastic flailing/crying/laughing/more flailing

God provided $15,500

(AND a plane ticket to launch, and help with my malaria meds and supplies)

in 11 weeks

(Note to my monthly donors, please keep giving until June. Thank you for being so cheerful!)

Here I am, so humbled and shocked that I couldn't even announce it.

I was afraid to announce it.

"I want the exact numbers first"

"oh but I KNOW God has done it!"

"but just in case, I don't want to say until I'm sure"

"but I know in my heart of hearts, God You are FAITHFUL!"

"why me? why me? why me? why me? how? how? HOW IN THE WORLD?"

The Lord has provided.

My God, You are faithful.

You saved me

You rescued me

You held me in Your arms

You counted all my tears

You cried with me

You laughed with me

You ushered me into a new season

You brought me to such a loving church family

You surrounded me with a great cloud of witnesses

then You told me to let everything go

Daddy, I did.

I got hit hard too

I broke down in anxiety

I gave up my false sense of control

I got hurt badly

I got punched in the gut by the ones I trusted most

Yet You told me to trust You

You called me to go

Then You provided the means, against all odds

Your plans cannot be thwarted 

I will never leave You

I'm Yours

Over and over, I fall in love with You more

I wake up and yearn to spend time with You

I miss Your word when the day gets busy, so I recall it in my heart

I recite it to You

See, Daddy, I'm learning

I'm learning

Give me wisdom

Let me hear Your voice

Sing over me.

Lord, let me know what to do now.

I am a broken record, stuck on a chorus of praise: God, my God You are faithful!